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Thursday, April 16, 2015

Love Doesn't Mean We Have to Like the Same Things

Mr. Frank: Ceecee, I'm gonna fix a nice lunch, and see if Doll Face is in the mood for a picnic.

Ceecee: How come she never brings the food, Frank?

Mr. Frank: Have you seen that canned stuff she eats? The girl's got a lot of talents, but cooking isn't one of them.

Mr. Frank: How would you like to go on a picnic with me, Doll? I've prepared a gourmet lunch for us.

Lilly Faye: Sounds good, Frank. Let's find a scenic spot. I'll drive.

Mr. Frank: I was thinking I would give you a ride for a change.

Lilly Faye: Don't be silly. I'll warm up my car, and be right over to pick you up.

Dizzie: How come you never want to ride with Frank, Boss?

Lilly Faye: Have you gotten a good look at his wheels?

Dizzie: No.

Monday, April 13, 2015

A Typical Day at the Blog

Dear Readers,
Some of you have written in asking what a typical day is like here at the blog.

The photos come first. Dizzie, my blog intern, is our photographer.

Lilly Faye: Dizzie, don't you dare take my picture! I haven't been through hair and makeup yet!


Dizzie: Look, Boss! I took another selfie!

Lilly Faye: We usually finish the photo shoot around noon.

Cali: Is Frank bringing lunch today?

Ceecee: No. Frank is watching cooking videos on YouTube.

Lilly Faye: After lunch, I encourage my staff to stretch their legs and participate in morale building activities...

Alfie Cat: Help! What's the safe word? I can't remember the safe word!

Lilly Faye: ...while I catch up on my reading.

By then, we all need a nap.

Lilly Faye: So you see, Dear Readers, blogging is a hard job, and not nearly as glamorous as it appears.  But it's also an important job, and we're happy to do it for you.

Lilly Faye

Thursday, April 9, 2015

Be Careful What You Wish For

Lilly Faye: Frank, how would you like to take me shopping? I want to buy some pretty flowers for my yard.

Mr. Frank: I can't, Doll. Sorry. My chili cart is keeping me too busy.

Lilly Faye: Chili cart?

Mr. Frank: Remember when my fans Mattie and Zoe came to visit me, and sampled my famous chili?

Lilly Faye: Mattie and Zoe, the French Bulldog sisters? Grrrr...I remember.

Mr. Frank: They raved about my chili on Dogspace and Woofer. Now I can hardly keep up with the demand! I set up a cart downtown, and I'm doing a brisk business selling my chili to the lunch crowd.

Lilly Faye: Don't people want something a bit lighter now that the weather is warming up?

Dizzie: Actually, Boss, the hot spices in Mexican food make you sweat, which cools down the body.

Lilly Faye: You're not helping, Diz.

Mr. Frank: Mattie and Zoe said...

Lilly Faye: Mattie and Zoe don't know everything!

Mr. Frank: Gosh, Doll, I didn't realize this would upset you so much. I guess I could quit if you want me to.

Lilly Faye: Then you would have time to take me shopping!

Mr. Frank: True. I was only selling chili to earn enough money to take you to the Spring Fling. But if you don't want to go, I'm fine with that.

Dizzie: He's got you there, Boss.

Lilly Faye: Aaaggghhh!

Monday, April 6, 2015

Not Always As It Appears

Lilly Faye: Wait up guys, Diz is in the water.

Dizzie: This new Bluetooth headset is great! My cell is on the sand thirty feet away, and I'm standing in the water talking to you. Seriously!

Lilly Faye: He's just standing there like a statue.

Dizzie: So Bo, my advice is to enjoy the White House while you can. These last couple of years are gonna fly by. Say hello to Michelle and the girls for me. Gotta go, I'm getting a call from my pal Clooney.

Alfie Cat: I'll bet he's peeing in the water.

Mr. Frank: I've heard that attracts sharks.

Dizzie: Hi, George. Yeah, I was just talking to my cousin Bo. He has some sort of beef with a dog in the Secret Service detail.

How's married life? She wants to litigate everything? Well, you knew she was a lawyer when you married her. Sure, Ben makes it look easy, but Jennifer deserves part of the credit for that.

Alfie Cat: Occasionally, I'll catch him staring into space at home. Sometimes I think he doesn't have much going on between his ears.

Mr. Frank: Maybe he's stuck in the sand. We might have to go down there and pull him out.

Lilly Faye: He doesn't even see me waving at him. I hope he's not having a seizure.

Dizzie: I have to go now, George. The Boss is gesturing wildly, and my toes are starting to shrivel. Thanks for the poker invite. I'll try to make it to the next game.

Dizzie: Hey, Boss. I was just talking to my Cousin Bo and George Clooney.

Mr. Frank: This is so sad.

Lilly Faye: It's gonna be alright, Diz. Just come along with us. We'll take good care of you.

Dizzie: Oh no, I can't find my phone!