The Elopement

Lilly Faye: Let's say our goodbyes before we leave, Frank.

Mr. Frank: I'm excited about going to France with Doll Face, and attending Le Cordon Bleu cooking school, Sis. My only regret is I won't be here to cook for you every night.

Ceecee: Don't worry about me, Frank. I need to cut back anyway. Your food is a bit rich.

Ceecee: The nights will be a lot longer without you, though.

Lilly Faye: I'll miss you, Alfie.

Alfie Cat: I'll miss Frank's cooking on movie nights. I can't believe I won't be getting any more of his shrimp.

Lilly Faye: Dizzie, you've been the best unpaid blog intern a boss could ever hope for. I'm confident you've got a future in entertainment journalism. You've shown a lot of initiative, especially with your reporting from the Oscars and the Golden Globes. 

I'm giving you the blog password for safekeeping. Don't go overboard ordering cases of Oinkies.

Dizzie: Thanks for taking a chance on me when I was just a young pup, and giving me my first job, Boss. I'm gonna miss you. I don't think I've ever said this before, but I love you, Boss. Sniff.

I want you to have these frequent flyer miles as a wedding present.

Lilly Faye: I thought THE MASTER locked his miles in a vault after the last two times you helped yourself to them.

Dizzie: These are a gift from Chad, my pal on the Scandalous Hollywood Insiders Tonight television show. He said he does so much flying in his job, he could never use up all his miles before they expire. He wants you to have them. 

Chad says to tell the flight crew you and Frank are getting married, and they might bump you up to first class, or at least give you an extra bag of nuts.

Lilly Faye: Frank and I are ready to leave for France, Cali. We've decided to elope! I'm sorry you won't have the chance to be my bridesmaid after all.

Cali: I'm happy for you, Lilly Faye. You finally got your fella! Don't worry about anything here. I'll keep an eye on your place while you're gone.

Lilly Faye: How's Ceecee, Frank? Is she going to be alright?

Mr. Frank: Her knitting needles were clicking like crazy when I left the house, but she's happy for me.

I love you, Doll.

Lilly Faye: I love you, too, Frank.

Mr. Frank: Let's get to the airport, Doll. We don't want to miss our flight!

Dizzie: No, we sure don't.

Mr. Frank: You're not going with us!

The car door slams.

Lilly Faye: Buckle up! 

Vroom!

Mind If I Tag Along?

Mr. Frank: Ugh! My tie is too tight, and I'm sweating bullets.

Ceecee: It's your nerves. Are you sure this is what you want, Frank?

Mr. Frank: I'm sure. Tonight's the perfect night for it. Trombone Shorty's music will put Doll Face in the right mood, and I have an intimate little dinner planned for the two of us after the concert. That's when I'll make my move.

Meanwhile, next door...

Lilly Faye: I can't make up my mind what to wear tonight. I've tried on every dress in my closet, and nothing seems right. This isn't like me, I'm usually so self-confident.

Lilly Faye: Frank has been hinting about having a big surprise planned for me. We're already engaged, so what could it be? I just hope everything goes smoothly tonight. I'm nervous enough as it is.

Ding-dong...

Lilly Faye: Hello, may I help you?

Dizzie: It's me, Boss!

Lilly Faye: Dizzie? Why are you dressed like that?

Dizzie: I'm going to the Trombone Shorty concert with you and Frank! They had three adjoining seats available, so I bought the extra ticket for myself. I knew you wouldn't mind, Boss. As you always say, the more, the merrier!

Lilly Faye: Grrrrr....

French Twist

Dizzie: Boss, there's a Citroen convertible parked in front of Frank's house.

Lilly Faye: A what?

Dizzie: It's a French automobile. Don't you watch Top Gear, Boss?

Lilly Faye: Oh, no! Those French Bulldog sisters must be back. You remember, Diz, they made a play for Frank back in March.

Meanwhile, next door...

Mattie: Frank, as soon as we heard about your new Snack Shack on Woofer, my sister and I knew we had to pay you another visit.

Zoe: It was worth the trip! What a delicacy. We haven't had escargots prepared this well since we were in the South of France.

Mattie: Where do you source your escargots, Frank?

Mr. Frank: In the back garden, underneath the geraniums.

Zoe: You're not only hot, Frank, you're resourceful. I like that.

Ceecee: Did you girls also hear that Frank is engaged to be married?

Mattie: But there's still time to sow a few wild oats, right, Frank?

Mr. Frank: Gulp!

Too Much of a Good Thing

Mr. Frank: Hiya, Doll. This is a nice surprise.

Lilly Faye: Frank, you haven't taken me out on a date in ages. I have to come over here to your restaurant window just to see you.

Mr. Frank: I haven't had the time. Thanks for getting me into that bridal magazine, Doll. Since the article and photos ran, my walk-up restaurant business has been booming!

Lilly Faye: Sigh.

Later that afternoon...

Dizzie: What's wrong, Boss?

Lilly Faye: Now Frank is too busy with his walk-up restaurant to take me out on a date.

Dizzie: I wouldn't worry, Boss. Things will get back to normal once the newness wears off. It's not like the world is going to beat a path to Frank's bedroom window.

Meanwhile, next door...

Ceecee: Frank, a tour bus driver just phoned in an order for thirty-five boxed lunches. They'll be here in less than an hour.

Second Thoughts

Mr. Frank: I don't think Doll Face is outside today, but let's stick close to the house, just in case.

Ceecee: I thought you wanted to be together.

Mr. Frank: I do! But when I saw her reading that Bride magazine the other day, my entire future flashed before my eyes. I suddenly realized if we were married, she'd be telling me when I could practice my tuba, and making me watch all those chick flicks she likes, and I'd never be able to save enough money to open my own restaurant.

Ceecee: Maybe you're misreading the situation, Frank. You're basing a lot on one magazine.

Mr. Frank: It was a bridal magazine! What else could it mean?

Ceecee: You need to discuss this with her, not me.

Lilly Faye: Hi, Frank! I've been looking all over for you!

Mr. Frank: Aaaahhhh! You scared me, Doll. You shouldn't sneak up on a fellow like that!

Lilly Faye: Why did you run off so fast the other day?

Mr. Frank: Umm...well....

Ceecee: Tell her the truth, Frank.

Mr. Frank: When I saw you reading that Bride magazine, I got cold feet.

Lilly Faye: I've been invited to model a wedding gown. I was checking out the latest styles before I give them my answer.

Mr. Frank: Is that all it was? What a relief! Heh, heh...heh, heh, heh....

Lilly Faye: A relief? Does this mean you don't want to get married?

Mr. Frank: Gulp!