Happy Mardi Gras!
I've been trying to make contact with my blog intern, Dizzie, who has been missing in action since Oscar night.
Lilly Faye: Diz, can you see me? Where are you?
Dizzie: I'm still here in Hollywood, Boss.
I need to clear something up. I did not trip Jennifer Lawrence. She fell over me. There's a difference. Also, I did not get any pizza.
Lilly Faye: Why didn't you come home after the Oscars?
Dizzie: Clooney and his pals took me to a bunch of Oscar after-parties, and they were awesome!
Angelina couldn't keep her hands off of me. There were trays of food and drink everywhere.
Someone, I'm not naming names, got charged with contributing to the delinquency of a canine--that would be me. A bunch of us guys got hauled in around 2:00 A.M.
Lilly Faye: You spent the night in jail? I hope you didn't do anything to damage the reputation of the blog!
Dizzie: Relax, Boss. It was only a few hours. There was a slight misunderstanding. I thought Pharrell wanted me to have his hat. We got it all straightened out at the station.
Lilly Faye: Oh, nooooooo.........
Dizzie: Don't worry about a thing, Boss. I've already set the record straight. I explained everything to a reporter from that show, Scandalous Hollywood Insiders Tonight.
When he showed up at the jail, I raised my paw right away and volunteered to be interviewed. I know how much you want publicity for the blog. I made sure he wrote down "A Poodle Looks at Life," and spelled your name correctly, with three Ls.
Lilly Faye: Oh, dear dawg. I'll never live this down.
Dizzie: Luckily, Sandra Bullock posted my bail. Turns out, she's a huge animal lover! She took me to the In-N-Out for a burger after we left the jail. She's a really great person. Did you know she adopts handicapped rescue dogs?
Lilly Faye: How are we ever going to explain this to THE MASTER, Diz?
Dizzie: Hopefully, we won't have to. I'll be home before you know it. Sandra offered to take me to LAX and put me on a plane. We're headed there now, as soon as she finds an earring she left here Sunday night.
By the way, can you pick me up at the airport, Boss?
Several hours later....